Carelis Conde, a Cuban resident in the United States, decided to address a topic that causes divisions among migrants in a video: the comparisons about how each person arrived at their destination. To introduce her reflection, she read actual comments she found on social media, where some emigrants belittle the experiences of others.
"Those who entered with parole don't know what it means to struggle," one of the quoted comments stated. Another asserted, "I was a raft person; I came on a boat and spent four days at sea. I don’t know what these people who come now on a plane, fresh and comfortable, are complaining about." He also mentioned phrases like, "Coming through five countries and crossing the Darién jungle is worse than risking it at sea."
After reading these messages, Carelis wondered, “Why do we engage in comparisons? Is your immigration situation any less painful than mine? Did I alone struggle to get to where I am?” Her reflection revolved around the idea that all experiences of emigration are unique and valid, and that comparing them only fosters unnecessary divisions among people who share the pain of leaving their homeland and starting anew.
In an empathetic tone, @carelisconde argued that every migration story holds its own value, regardless of the means or moment in which it occurred. "Every scar, every tear, makes you who you are. It makes you unique," she expressed. "To think that just because someone didn't go through what you experienced makes them less capable of enduring what you endured is to forget that all of us, when we emigrate, regardless of how, go through a grieving process," she added.
Your message did not go unnoticed, and many users reacted by sharing their own stories. "I crossed five countries with my daughter; I still have nightmares, but we all went through something tough," wrote one person. Another commented: "We all suffer in one way or another; in the end, we are far from our loved ones, starting from scratch." Someone else added: "Leaving your country is always a painful sacrifice, no matter how you did it."
Some opinions contrasted with Conde's message, highlighting differences in the processes. "It shouldn't be compared, but the one who entered with parole has it easier," commented one user. Another pointed out, "The first ones who came paved the way for the Cuban Adjustment Act, but we continue to fight for our status to be regularized."
On the other hand, there were comments that celebrated the call for empathy and unity. "All emigrants share something: we leave behind who we are. That unites us more than it separates us," stated one person. Another user summarized it by saying, "In the end, we have all suffered and we need to adapt; comparing ourselves leads to nothing."
The diversity of reactions also included heartfelt messages: “I spent 13 days in the Darién jungle, but I agree with her: every experience has value.” Another user shared: “The sea was my thing, and although I survived, I know that others had a tough time too.” In contrast, someone else remarked: “The process of emigrating is different for everyone, but starting over in another country always hurts.”
Carelis concluded her reflection with an invitation to look beyond the differences and to appreciate what unites emigrants: the strength of having faced such a significant change, regardless of how it occurred.
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