From the United States, the user lyli shared on social media her distress over the number of messages she receives from Cuba, where family and acquaintances constantly talk to her about the difficulties on the island and ask for help, without inquiring about her own situation.
"I want to make this little video without the intention of hurting anyone or making anyone feel bad, but I'm scared to call Cuba because the topic is 'what hunger, what misery, these blackouts, I'm fed up.' Folks, we also struggle here," she said in her first video.
According to her account, every time she checks her phone, the messages she receives are the same: "Wherever you go, they write the same thing, they say the same thing. It’s hard here too, folks; it’s difficult to have everything because everything comes at a cost. It’s so hard that I don’t even want to open my messages anymore." She asserts that she understands the situation in Cuba because she has lived through it, but feels powerless to help, which makes her feel bad. "People need to understand that living here doesn’t mean you’re... I mean, you’re not a millionaire. No, you’re not a millionaire; you’re struggling," she emphasized.
In a second video, Lyli responded to those who criticize her and remind her that when she was in Cuba, she used to help others. "Hey, yesterday a friend of mine tells me... this is the second part of the video, she says: 'Wow, when you lived here in Cuba, you helped me and gave me things.' Folks, I don't have anything. I don’t have anything to give anyone, I have three kids." She expressed her pain at noticing that people are not interested in how she or her family is doing. "People don’t ask me how you are, how your boy is, how your girl is... nothing. It's just that, folks. It hurts because we are struggling here, they need to understand that."
She insists that she wishes she could help, but she doesn't even have enough for herself. "What I wish more than anything is to help people, to give everything to others, but I don't even have enough for myself, how am I supposed to give to others, folks? Damn, no one knows the struggles we go through here. Enough already, enough, because it makes me feel terrible. It's not that I'm shameless or that I've taken anything from anyone. I haven't taken anything from anyone; the truth is I have nothing to give, folks. Damn, don't call me again with the same request, I don't have it."
In a third video, which went viral on the platform, the Cuban reacted to a comment from a user who related to her testimony and expressed that she had cried while listening to it. "Hey, this is real, this is not content, this is real. You say 'you made me cry because I'm going through a situation like that with my family.' Yes, it’s tough. People don’t understand that one feels bad because one has nothing, because everything has a cost here. And you know, because you have a daughter, that life with a child here is even more difficult; everything becomes harder, the expenses are more, uh, it’s not as easy as people think."
She confessed that she feels pressured every time she checks her messages. "I feel embarrassed, it's hard for me to open the messages and see people telling me 'I’m hungry, I have blackouts, I’m living in misery.' The only things I have here are light and food, and I’ve gained so much weight that I look like a cow, nothing more, because I haven’t been able to work more since I don’t have anyone to take care of my kids, and childcare is incredibly expensive and I can’t afford it. It’s tough, and people just don’t seem to understand that." Faced with this situation, she revealed that she’s at her breaking point and has considered closing her social media. "I’m really struggling with this, I swear I’m about to delete WhatsApp and everything. I’m on the verge of getting rid of it all so that no one can message me anymore, so I won't have to hear anything more."
The videos have generated a significant amount of reactions among Cubans both on the island and abroad, many of whom resonate with his testimony. Some have expressed support and understanding, while others have criticized his stance.
"I no longer even feel like calling them. They overwhelm me, they only complain and share bad news," wrote one user. Another person agreed: "You know what the problem is? We are to blame ourselves because most Cubans go to Cuba and don't really explain how things are here." Others pointed out that even when they send money, it's never enough: "Even if I send them a million, it’s never enough."
There were also those who shared similar experiences: "I'm thinking of blocking with the pain of my soul because they even offend me, and I'm stuck here, only able to get by by paying." Another user commented: "I send my family everything thanks to God. Ever since I arrived here years ago, I don't know what the difficulty is." Someone else expressed resignation about the situation: "If you don't pay rent, where do you go? It's really hard."
Others believe that the pressure felt by emigrants is the fault of the Cuban system: "That genocidal government has instilled in them that we are responsible for all our brother Cubans; it's a very sad situation in my homeland." Meanwhile, some have chosen to distance themselves: "I have no obligation to anyone in Cuba, so I don't respond to anyone, neither calls nor messages, and I haven't been back in over 8 years and I won't."
The story of Lyli has sparked a debate about the relationship between Cubans who emigrate and their families on the island, highlighting the pressure and guilt that many feel when they can't provide as much help as they would like.
Frequently Asked Questions about the Pressure to Help Family Members in Cuba from Abroad
Why do Cubans abroad feel pressure to help their relatives in Cuba?
The pressure that many Cubans abroad feel to help their families in Cuba is due to the precarious economic and social situation on the island. Relatives constantly communicate their needs and difficulties, such as the lack of food and power outages, hoping for support from those who have emigrated. This expectation can create a sense of responsibility and, at times, guilt among the emigrants.
How does this pressure affect Cubans living abroad?
The pressure to help family members in Cuba can create significant emotional and financial stress for Cubans living abroad. Many face economic challenges in their countries of residence and feel unable to meet all the demands of their families on the island. Furthermore, this situation can lead to family tensions and considerable emotional strain.
What challenges do Cubans face when trying to help their families in Cuba?
The challenges include specific economic constraints, high shipping costs, and the need to carefully plan what is sent due to weight and cost limitations. Additionally, there is the emotional pressure of wanting to send more aid than is possible and the frustration that the efforts made are not always appreciated or understood by family members in Cuba.
What do Cubans abroad think about the impact of their assistance on the island?
Many Cubans abroad believe that their support is vital for the well-being of their families in Cuba, despite criticisms and challenges. They consider that their efforts are driven by love and responsibility towards their loved ones, beyond any political implications. However, some also worry about how their actions might be perceived as indirect support for the Cuban regime.
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